A Rihanna song showed me how to live as a gay man in Iran

I was raised in Tehran under the Ayatollah’s sharia law and the daily watch of the Basij, with my parents embracing the Islamic Revolution and its strict rules. The Ayatollah’s face on the walls reminded us what was expected and what was forbidden; by my teenage years I knew I was different and began hiding my sexuality from my parents and the world.

At university I had three gay friends who understood the intricate lies needed to keep our secret and who told me about underground parties in the apartments of gay men and trans women, transformed with sound systems, lights and homemade alcohol. When I finally got an invite, I dressed like the boybands I’d watched on MTV, and in a friend’s car Rihanna’s Don’t Stop the Music was playing on cassette.

We entered the apartment, the song came on, the room bounced and I was lost in a new world; on the drive home I listened again to take myself back.

Iran, Tehran

rihanna, iran, tehran, ayatollah, basij, sharia law, islamic revolution, gay man, underground parties, trans women