Simon Hattenstone recalls panicking on first shift at the Friendship Inn

Simon Hattenstone says he panicked during his first shift behind the bar at the Friendship Inn in Prestwich in the mid-1980s.

He had adored pubs and, thanks to his friend Ned, taken the job in his early 20s. He believed he understood how to pour drinks — leaving Guinness to stand, aiming for half an inch of head on a pint of bitter, and not filling a glass of water when someone asked for whisky — but as soon as he was behind the bar he panicked.

The bar’s shape, like the bow of a ship, made customers call from different sides and he could not remember faces or orders. He describes faces becoming "twisted, distorted, ghoulish", compares the panic to Mia Farrow confronting the coven in Rosemary’s Baby, poured the wrong drinks and broke glasses. After about half an hour the manager told him he was not cut out for the work and would not be paid; the manager did not ask for compensation for the broken glasses and eventually lifted the hatch to let him leave. He could not tell his parents or Ned about the episode.

The shame remains, he says, and recently he confessed the story to Joyce, who runs the Lincoln Arms in King’s Cross. Joyce has promised to give him a few minutes behind the bar to get it out of his system — aversion therapy, 40 years on.

Key Topics

Culture, Simon Hattenstone, Friendship Inn, Prestwich, Lincoln Arms, Kings Cross