Eight reasons men avoid therapy, and why they should

Dr Stephen Blumenthal, a consultant clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst, writes in the Guardian about eight recurring reasons men resist therapy and argues that therapy can help when men do engage. Blumenthal notes men make up only 33% of referrals to NHS talking therapies, report lower life satisfaction than women, and “make up three-quarters of suicides and problems with addiction,” yet most who try therapy have a positive experience, the article says.

He cites several barriers: boys and men tend to be primed for action rather than words, making verbal emotional expression difficult; therapy is often experienced as “feminised” with an emphasis on direct feeling-talk; and many men prefer shoulder-to-shoulder or group approaches, coaching, mentoring or activity-based work.

The Men’s Sheds Association, the article says, reports 89% of participants feel less depressed after taking part. Showing vulnerability can feel risky in hierarchical settings, Blumenthal writes, and the cultural legacy of the solitary “go-it-alone” male ideal discourages help-seeking.

Some men experience emotional discussion as overwhelming — Marcus tells the therapist he can “do it for a bit” but then feels “completely overwhelmed” — so practical frameworks and symptom-management techniques may be needed alongside exploration. Men often wait until crisis point to seek help.

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