Space Warlord Baby Trading Simulator skewers Wall Street with absurd baby-trading satire

According to Polygon, Strange Scaffold’s Space Warlord Baby Trading Simulator, out now on Steam, turns the stock market into an absurdist joke by treating infants as tradable assets.

Polygon says the game — a spin-off of 2021’s Space Warlord Organ Trading Simulator — presents a future where babies are the most valuable resource and players trade stocks that simulate a child’s life from birth to death, buying low and selling high as life events push values up and down.

The review explains the core loop: choose a story scenario with a profit goal, pick from a set of alien babies each day, then watch a line graph as milestones and random events raise or sink a baby’s price — helping a neighbor can boost value, speaking out against the government can tank it, and outcomes are often wildly unpredictable.

Polygon details additional mechanics such as shorting a baby, placing side bets, and hiring advisors who take a cut and can be wrong; the piece praises many laugh-out-loud moments but notes the central joke can wear thin as handcrafted gags repeat across campaigns.

Polygon reports more campaigns and content are planned over the next two months and says you can understand the game’s point within an hour; the reviewer calls it a short, anarchic cautionary tale about how little control players have in markets like this.

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