Talk with Your mother rather than contacting her friend

Talk with Your mother rather than contacting her friend — Static01.nyt.com
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It’s natural to feel protective of an elderly parent, but avoid infantilizing your mother. You don’t mention cognitive decline, and she has eight decades of experience with friendships.

Friendships are voluntary: the younger woman is free to engage as she chooses and has no obligation to meet your timetable. There’s little point in trying to nudge or shame her back into the relationship, and we don’t know what challenges she may be facing.

Instead, speak with your mother about what happened. She may welcome a chance to vent or to grieve, and listening can be helpful even when you can’t fix the situation.

Support your mother emotionally, but resist inserting yourself unnecessarily or contacting the person who withdrew; focus on your mother’s feelings and wishes.

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